Jacques Cousteau’s Amazing Discovery
In the early 1940s a French man named Jacques Cousteau invented going into the water, in a daring move which at the time was proclaimed ‘batshit stupid’ by many in academia. Since the dawn of time mankind had lived in fear of water, believing it to be some form of evil, highly toxic acid, but this all changed thanks to Mr Cousteau.
One brisk summer’s morning, infront of a chattering crowd of other French people, he dared to do what none had dared do before – jumped into some water. Rejoicing upon seeing his skin resolutely failing to be burned off, and not hearing him screaming for his life, the whole crowd jumped in too, and had a party.
Several peasants drowned during the ensuing celebrations, but nobody really cared – man’s oldest enemy had been defeated! Now, barely 60 years later, our understanding of water has revolutionised the entire world.
So, the next time you carelessly have a drink of water, or it rains and nobody runs away screaming, just remember that it’s all down to one man – Mr Jacques Cousteau!